A Starter Guide To Self Improvement

Staying calm, composed and maintaining strong self esteem in today’s tough environment can be difficult but is not impossible if you follow a few simple guidelines. Here are 6 tips you can use as a starter guide to self improvement.

Everything and everyone else around you can affect your self esteem. Other people can deliberately or inadvertently damage your self image. Unchecked people and circumstances can ultimately destroy your self esteem and pull you down in ways you won’t even notice. Don’t let these influences get the best of you. But what should you avoid?

1 : A Negative Work Environment

Beware of a “dog eat dog” environment where everyone else is fighting just to get ahead. This is where non-appreciative people usually thrive and working extra is expected and not rewarded. In this environment no one will appreciate your contributions even if you miss lunch, dinner, and stay at work late into the night. Unless you are very fortunate most of the time you will work too hard with no help from others around you. This type of atmosphere will ruin your self esteem. This is not just healthy competition, at its worst it is brutal and very damaging.

2: Other Peoples Behavior

Bulldozers, brown nosers, gossipmongers, whiners, backstabbers, snipers, people walking wounded, controllers, naggers, complainers, exploders, patronizers, sluffers – whatever you want to call them, all have one thing in common – an overriding desire to prosper at the expense of others. Avoid them and do not be tempted to join them. They may get some short term advantage with their behavior but deep down most are very insecure, unhappy and ashamed of their behavior. For most their self esteem disappeared a long time ago. Seeing someone like this prosper is sickening but do not join them – you are better than that!

3: A Changing Environment

In today’s fast moving society it is difficult if not impossible to avoid change. Changes challenge our paradigms and tests our flexibility, adaptability and alter the way we think. Changes can make your life difficult and may cause stress but, if it’s inevitable, you must accept it, don’t fight it and in time find ways to improve your life. Try to manage change and try to avoid multiple changes at the same time. If a particular change can’t be avoided welcome it. Change will be with us forever, we must learn to live with it.

4: Past Experience

We all carry “baggage” – past experiences which have molded us to who we are today, but some people live in their past experiences – usually something that hurt and still hurts. It’s okay to cry out when you experience pain but don’t let pain dominate your life as it will transform itself into fears and phobias. If something painful happens, or has happened to you, find a way to minimize the effects. Discuss it with a friend, a family member or a professional if necessary and move on. Don’t let it continue to dominate your life and dictate your future actions. Because something bad has happened doesn’t mean it will happen again. Learn what you can from any bad experience and move on.

5: Negative World View

The television news is full of doom and gloom and it is true that around the world there are many people suffering war, famine or other natural or man-made disasters. Whilst I do not suggest you should not care and do nothing, remember that there are many beautiful positive things happening too. Don’t wrap yourself up with all the negative aspects around the world. Learn to look for beauty too for, in building self esteem, we must learn how to be positive in a negative world.

6: Determination Theory

Are we a product of our biological inherited characteristics (nature) or a result of the influences we absorb throughout out lives (nurture)? I believe how we are is due to a mixture of both nurture and nature and as a result our behavioral traits are not fixed. While it is true that some things are dictated by genetics (for example race, color and many inherited conditions) your environment and the people in your life have a major effect on your behavior. You are your own person, you have your own identity and make your own choices. The characteristics your mother or father display are not your destiny. Learn from other people’s experience, so you don’t suffer the same mistakes.

Are some people are born leaders or positive thinkers? I don’t believe so. Being positive, and staying positive is a choice. Building self esteem and drawing on positive experiences for self improvement is a choice, not a rule or a talent. No-one will come to you and give you permission to build your self esteem and improve your self. It is in your control.

It can be hard to keep positive, especially when others and circumstances seem to be conspiring to pull you down. You need to protect yourself and give yourself a chance to stay positive. Improving your self esteem gives you that protection.

One way to stay positive is to minimize your exposure to harmful influences while using affirmations to boost the positive influences in your life. Constantly reminding yourself of the good things in your life will keep the impact of negative influences to a minimum.

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Common Habits Of Happy Families

What makes some families more happy than others? The short answer is they are aware of doing things that make them happy. They have probably taken the time to explore what they like to do, what makes the members of the family happy and importantly make the time to do those things more regularly than the things that they don’t particularly enjoy.

It sounds simple and it is. It is about not being lazy! People who are happy are more aware!

Aware of what you may ask, and that’s a great question. Individuals in the family are aware of what they like and actually go out regularly and simply do those things. Most importantly, they do those things together. Hence the saying has arisen that the family that plays together, stays together!

Here are 5 common habits of happy families.

1 Being Grateful for everything in their lives. Having gratitude for the things that they have. Gratitude comes from an awareness of acceptance of what life is offering to each of us at any given moment. If you do not have acceptance in the present moment, than it is more difficult to be grateful. Accetance and gratitude are the foundations for enthusiasm which brings for the feelings we all desire which is happiness.

2 Acceptance of the consequences of our choices and finding an appropriate level of satisfaction leads to happiness. When you have the habit of acceptance or satisfaction of what happens, you enjoy life more. People who try and “maximse” everything that they engage in are usually to wrung out at the end of the day to enjoy anything. They are never satisfied and are continually chasing their tail, so to speak. Simply limit the number of choices on offer to you is helpful.

3 Focussing on one thing at a time is a habit for happy families. The power to pay attention to what you as a family are wanting is a great habit to engage in because it limits the choices, focusses each family member and everyone can take some ownership of the family experience.

4 Simply being together and hanging out together. Being comfortable with not doing things all the time.

5 Love yourself forst and then love your family by spreading the magic of love in each moment. Human beings thrive on close personal relationships. Human beings do not like to be on their own most of the time.

So it is in the understanding and being aware of the things we do regularly as a family unit that offer the level of satisfaction or happiness of being part of a happy family. From here you can live a rich life.

Arranging A Day Of Family Fun

Planning an occasional family fun day can be a wonderful way to enjoy quality time together. Sometimes even simply setting aside a time to do some fun activities can be great way to something fun that is different than what you normally do. Even simple activities like watching a DVD together or taking a walk through a neighborhood park can be a great deal of fun. Here are a few ideas you can use for inspiration when planning your next family fun day.

Bring Your Family Together for a Discussion

If you are having trouble thinking of activities that might be enjoyable for the entire family, why not simply call a family meeting and ask everyone what they want to do? You will probably find that even little children have good ideas for adventures that the entire family can enjoy. Have everyone brainstorm and write down the best ideas. Then go over all the ideas and decide which ones you should try first. You might even discover that there are enough great ideas to use for lots of months of fun to come.

Simple and Yet Fun Family Activities

It’s important to remember that even the simplest of activities can be fun when you enjoy them together as a family. While planned trips are very enjoyable, unexpected car rides for quick trips can be exciting as well. Many delightful activities are actually quite affordable, or even free at times. Try simply going for a drive, visit a shopping mall, or spend part of the afternoon at a matinee movie. Needless to say, make sure to bring your camera with you so that you will be able to take a few pictures of your family enjoying the time together. Action shots of your family can be delightful accents in your house when you display them in collage picture frames.

Great Suggestions for Fun and Economical Family Trips

Your family is likely to think of lots of great ideas for places to go to on your family fun day. You may wish to visit a park, the local zoo, or perhaps a fascinating museum within driving distance. Occasionally, you might even choose to plan to have your family fun day at home. Get a big batch of popcorn popped, and watch some old home videos as a family. Actually, even household chores such as yard work or landscaping can be enjoyable when you do it together. Take some photos no matter what you do, even if you simply spend the time at home. They’ll remind you of the terrific times you’ve had as a whole family when you place the pictures in gallery picture frames.

Make a Scrapbook for Your Memories

When you start arranging family fun days regularly, it can be a good idea to make a memory scrapbook. When you remember to carry your camera with you all the time you are guaranteed to get lots of great pictures together. By creating a scrapbook, you will have a great way to exhibit and enjoy these treasured family memories. And don’t forget to place those especially good pictures in picture frames to place around your house.

So plan your upcoming family fun day immediately, because you are sure to have a great time!

Tighter Family Relationship

If I seen many people around, they have hard work at office to get the money so they said they could have better life. But when we start sitting down at our office chair, we forget our reason to get a job. They are no longer working for their family, but to fulfill their career ambition.

On this moment we should think once again. I already seen this example from my own friend that achieve success in career. She traveled around the world to have a meeting with her office colleague from other branch. I really salute for what she have achieved for her career however her family condition is not really good.

Then we need to reconsider what actually we want in our life. If we get a job to make better live with family, why we left our family behind? So, we need to keep in mind about our first reason to get the job to support family.

Now this is your time to take an action to choose what kind of system you want to choose to tighten your family bond. Then start discusses how you can strengthen your family bond.

1. Use Phone or SMS – Phone or SMS considered useful to have communication on the distance with your family. The basic idea behind this is keep contact and have a chit-chat with your family member. My suggestion, don’t let relationship with your family lost for longer than 2 months. If you don’t make communication than you love to your family already decrease. Now we already have modern technology to help us communicate with our family faster. SMS or phone has been proven can make your communication better. This also can be effective when you have busy time in your office. You don’t take too much time to send SMS.

2. Show Appreciation – Most of the time we need to show our appretiation to our family. Show appreciation also can increase love between you and you family members. This will make you feel close to them and your relationship will get better. If you never do that, possible you or your family will feel empty in life. Therefore you should show them how much you care and take an action quickly. Not for tomorrow, but take an action today.

3. Give Flower – For so many years, people know flower as a symbol of fresh love and care. Fresh flower can have deeper meaning of love. Sometimes, I buy a bucket of flower to show my love to my wife. Flower can be a great gift that makes people happy. You can put those flowers in a vase and put in your family room to give fresh air and your will thanks for what you give to them. So if you love your family, why don’t you give them flower?

4. Eat Together – You can enchant your contact with your family during dinner. Even though it is not nice to have discussion while we eat, before dinner is ready you still may have discussion. At dinner you can find out more about your family. So you know exactly and feel your family condition. In here you can share what actually in your mind.

5. Watch movie with family – If you have a chance to watch movie together, then you have a chance to enjoy life with family. I often watch movie together with family. I feel so much different compared if am watching movie alone. When you watch movie together you will see the reaction of your family. You will see them laughing, you will see them smiling or you will see they get surprise. You can be more enjoying if you also discuss and share your view about the film.

6. Family holiday – family holiday could one of the best to have fun with your family. For me, it is already my biggest passion and dream. It is not only fun but every moment we feel will never be forgotten. However, family holiday is not always cheap. It is sometimes costly. Luckily, there are some places that do not need a lot of cash. For instance, you and your family can enjoy your holiday on beach. You can spend less money if you choose your family holiday on beach. Maybe if in your area you cannot find beach, you can go to park near you. Playing in park also fun enough, as long as you doing together with family.

The 6 way I told above is not all the way you can do to strengthen your relationship with family. Actually they are a lot of ways to do that. The basic idea, you need to spend your time together with your family. If you only have very short time, you still can give quality time to your family.

It could be bad if you some of us said they don’t have time with family. We can see for many years in the past. You can found so many families enjoy their life together, for example have a BBQ or dinner together with family. Can you see that kind of moment today?

In this modern world, we are living in rush society where people have to get good career to have good live. We do hardwork to finish our job at office. Some of us also take long shift or extra hour at office. That’s the reason why most of us cannot have fun with family.

Give a lot of money could the option for some people. To make it simpler, they purchase a console game such as Play Station, Xbox or Nintendo. So they will busy to play game alone. In my point of view, It would be more enjoyable if play console game with all family. One of the great ways that our family can enjoy. Like having holiday with family, but in this case you don’t need to go anywhere. It will be so much cheaper because you don’t spend your money on your journey to the place you choose to have a holiday.

So a good way to solve this problem you could set a schedule when is the time to have family holiday, or dinner every night. If you don’t make a plan, your family will not be united.

Sometimes when dinner come, some of our family members go hang out with friend or the parent still have extra time on the office. So it is crucial to create a schedule. It doesn’t matter how short it is.

Everyone on your family must have commitment to obey the play that already made. Including for parent, please stop working and ready to attend your dinner together with family. For children, choose the time when you want to have dinner with family and when you want to hang out with friends. In this matter, the parent should become an example for their children.

You don’t require starting with a big step. Change it little by little. If you still can’t commit with dinner, you could take your family on holiday. You can set a time whenever you like. If you don’t really have money to go, you don’t need to worries. You still can have fun at home, for example you can watch movie or play a game just like I told you before. When you do more activities along with your family, it can tight your bound with your family.

In conclusion, you can choose which ideas that your family enjoy. You may choose which method you like as long as you can continue to communicate with your family. All these ways will not be succeed if each of family members does spend their time to be together.